Wedding Update #33A - Our first session of Pre-Cana
We submitted our information ages ago, and finally our first session of Pre-Cana (our marriage counseling class) was this Friday. It took a while to get everything organized, because the couple that is hosting the session had a daughter who was getting married, and there are two other couples in our small group setting. I joked with Kris that it would be funny if I already knew anyone there, since before we met the hosts told us they had to coordinate with 2 other couples from UCI. Wouldn’t you know it - there was I knew, not well, but it was someone I’d previously taken a class with. 
Well, I can start off by saying I can definitely see why everyone says you get out of it what you put into it. Kris and I seem to be the most “boisterous” of the couples there, so I think this class is going to be really helpful. Second, it was not what we expected at all - but in a good way. One thing I totally didn’t realize is that the Catholic church really stresses the marriage & spouse as your most important relationship. Understandably, this should be the most important person in your life. What these classes are pointing out are that so often this relationship gets bogged down by friends, co-workers, and especially, your children, but what matters most is that if your marriage is strong, then all your other relationships will be strong. The other huge thing we’re learning about is how much your parents and relationships with other people shape how your marriage relationship interactions will be. There’s this whole empahsis on HIStory and HERitage.
So far it’s been a pretty interactive and fun process. We start out listening to a description of the topic we’re about to discuss from the host couple. Then they both give some great examples from their lives. Then there’s a workbook that each couple has (you could really almost do this on your own, but having a host to guide you through it is really helpful), and after the introduction we are asked to fill out a worksheet individually, then share with our fiance`/finacee. Then we discuss with everyone else if our answers surprised each other, and we each go through our own specific examples.
The first exercises we did were about important experiences and people in our lives and why they were important, and what we admired in ourselves and how others would described us and why. Then we looked at the “recipe” for a great marriage, and finished up with a worksheet about communication and our hopes and dreams. Now we have homework for next time - another worksheet on communication AND we have to write each other a love letter. 
Our next session is scheduled for Memorial Day, and I’m really looking forward to it. I was dreading this whole thing and thought it would be a pain, but I think I will actually be sad when the classes are over! Since the whole thing is a 12-hour course, it will probably be broken up into 4 sessions of 3 hours each. One down, three to go.
